Geoff's story
As an apprentice Chef I was slow to progress. I could cook.I could cook up a storm, but to make it with the pro Chefs you had to be able to cook, and cook fast. It was work speed that I lacked.
It wasn't until I was well into my second year that a new Head Chef came to the restaurant. Oscar, an experienced Chef from Switzerland, showed an interest in my future and took me under his wing. One shift, as we were in the middle of the diner service, Oscar identified something that kick-started my career. He could see I was being too cautious and deliberate in my work and thus, I was way too slow. As I tentatively reached into the oven to retrieve a tray of much anticipated goodies he spoke to me in a firm voice (understandable as we had 105 hungry customers waiting for their meals), "Hurry up son, what are you afraid of, it can only burn you". He gently pushed me aside and with all the confidence in the world, retrieved the tray and had most of it served by the time I had my oven cloth neatly folded and ready to grab the next tray.
I'm not sure I appreciated it at the time but that was a profound moment. From that day I progressed at a great rate, I was soon rostered on to the front kitchen on a permanent basis, as I had overcome an enormous hurdle. That hurdle was my fear; my unrealistic fear of being burnt. A fear that stemmed from my belief that being burnt, no matter how minor, was disastrous and should be avoided at all cost. The reality was that minor burns, those that heal quickly and rarely leave a scar, are an everyday part of working in a commercial kitchen. They happen, and the sun still rises. Obviously we don't throw caution to the wind, serious injury must be avoided, but we can still work effectively without the constraints of over-caution.
What Oscar had encouraged me to do was stop and think about my fear, to challenge my belief that avoiding burns, no matter how trivial, should be the foremost priority in my work. That belief was holding me back and Oscar freed me from it. As unimportant as it may have seemed at the time, it was an empowering lesson he had imparted.
I gained from a similar experience at Sue Cleland's Weekend Course " Overcoming Social Anxiety". The course was held in a user-friendly environment at the Hampton Community Centre. Sue encouraged us, a small group of 10 to 12, to challenge the beliefs that lay behind our fear, the fear that manifests itself as anxiety. I found the entire two days enormously beneficial. None of us was miraculously cured and Sue certainly doesn't claim to be a miracle healer, but each of us left with an armory of tools and techniques to help us tackle our Social Anxiety.
Sue lived with Social Anxiety for more than twenty years. Her knowledge, gained from experience of the condition is extremely valuable. Her calm disposition immediately created a non-threatening, welcoming atmosphere.
Sue led us through various aspects of our lives that should be considered when we take on our Social Anxiety. These included:
- Physical: Relaxation, Breathing, Exercise, and Massage.
- Internal: Nutrition and Complementary Therapies.
- Cognitive: Thinking Patterns, Belief Patterns and Focusing Skills.
- Inner Self: Self-Esteem.
- Interpersonal Level: Assertiveness.
- Behavioral: Exposure and Building Bridges.
- Recovery Issues: Setbacks, Motivation, Support, Commitment, Risk Taking and Goals.
It's a very full program; Sue offers the same subject matter over a period of several weeks in her home state of Queensland. I urge anyone wanting to free themselves of this common but often debilitating condition (that will affect one in seven Australians), to take the opportunity to participate in Sue's courses whenever they become available.
by Geoff - June 2003
TESTIMONIALS - from participants who attended Sue's April Social Anxiety Weekend Course!
I enjoyed coming and meeting other people with anxiety and just
to know that I'm not the only one and to face my fears and to
change my ways of thinking, that there is something wrong with
me. "I will change."
- Amanda
- Well structured and non-confrontational
- Practical advice/tools - i.e. won't happen overnight
- Believable because delivered by someone who has lived though it
- Good feeling at the end
I found the course very informative and have learnt a lot about my anxiety. I know what tools I have at hand and how to use them to recover. I would find a cassette with exercises to be beneficial for me so I could do it daily. A book would also be an additional tool. - Peta
Excellent subject coverage. It's obvious that you know your stuff. Suggestion- could you cover the subject of "conversation MECHANICS". How we interact and how we can improve our skills in social interaction. - Geoff
Excellent course. It was very helpful to me. I have done quite a lot of reading about social anxiety and had heard a lot of information before but this course really seemed to make it much more real and self directed. I feel a lot more motivated and clearer about how to proceed and what I want. - Stephen
I found this course very educational and beneficial. I had bought a few books on social anxiety but it was only after doing this course I realised it is "ME" that needs to change my thoughts, rather than trying to change the behaviours and actions of others. I learnt valuable tools which I will practice, so I can live a happy and fulfilling life. Thanks Sue. - Talitha
I have never been to an anxiety type course before and I am so glad I came. I understand why events were so daunting. Now I've learnt and know they are neutral, it's my thinking (perception) that needs changing. I love the phrase "we are insignificant to each other" and to keep the realistic thinking map in front of our face. I have it there and will endeavour to keep it there. Thanks. Cheers. - Mary-Anne
A weekend course is limited in scope so it was good in its limitations. It was good to be able to find out about different terms, methods, and ways to overcome anxiety. - Craig
Laid all the information out so it looked simple or realistic to be able to develop and practice new tools. Self esteem, nutrition, focus and belief patterns all made a lot of sense. Thankyou as it made me feel extremely hopeful about the future. - Liz
Enjoyable - not threatening. Good class size. Would like to hear more about other people's situations. Liked the fact that Sue had experienced social anxiety herself. Was fortunate to be in a class with a great bunch of people. Would recommend the course to others. Feel concerned about people who would be unable to attend the class due to their anxieties (unable to leave house, etc.) Thankyou. - Anne
Enjoyed it thoroughly. A lot of information for a weekend. Delivered
clearly and slowly I appreciated this. Good breaks for rest. Content
and structure excellent. Manual and work sheets seem manageable.
Thank you. - Rob
