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When Blushing Becomes a Disorder - Joe Bolza
Page uploaded 21 August 2009
By Joe Bolza
One of the many variations of social phobia is a heightened concern that if one blushes, it will be a target for ridicule by others. Usually the person who blushes is also very critical of themselves for blushing. They may see blushing as a sign that "they can't control themselves", or "a sign of inadequacy, weakness, anxiety, incompetence or being a liar". Because they see blushing as a fault that they hate, they often try to hide it, or avoid situations where they predict they may blush.
This in turn means they often try and avoid being a "focus of attention", as they have noticed they may blush in this kind of situation. This then means they may not want to speak up at meetings, chair meetings, or give any sort of speech at weddings or birthday parties. This often impacts heavily on their career opportunities, and their social lives. At this level, blushing has become a disorder because it disorders people's lives, and has become an ongoing anxious preoccupation.
Certain kinds of people are more likely to have this condition. These include:
- Perfectionists/ failure-haters
- Those subject to lots of criticism or teasing
- Those very competitive/image conscious
- Low self-esteem/sense of inadequacy/self-downers
- Those who have had panic attacks while being the focus of attention
- Conflict avoiders
- Those with a strong desire to be approved of
- Shy people
- Worriers
- Those who have done things they are ashamed of
- Those with fair skin
Frequently, if this concern is overwhelming, it's possible to feel depressed as well.
Case Example:
Marilyn is a secretary who suffers from blushing. It occurs when she confronts her boss, and other authority figures. It also occurs when she's "put on the spot" with unexpected questions. She hates the symptoms as she believes it gives an impression to others that she is lying. She works very hard at her job, attempting to "get her work right" and "covering all bases" so that it will not attract criticism and awkward questions. She admits to being a perfectionist. She takes the minutes at meetings but never speaks up. She often works hours beyond her expected duties, gets exhausted and depressed. Recently she has taken a lot of sick leave because of this.
Cognitive behavioural therapy (CBT) is particularly useful with treating this condition. The belief that blushing is a personality fault is challenged. Sufferers learn to replace their beliefs with more accurate and comforting attitudes. They learn to be less self-critical and to give less importance to what others "might" (and usually don't) think. On the behavioural side, sufferers learn to gradually cut back their avoidance and to discover that their blushing doesn't attract the level of criticism and ridicule that they fear.
Joe Bolza is a former clinical psychologist specializing in CBT treatment for anxiety disorders. He has suffered from social phobia himself, and recovered.
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